To make buckets and buckets of money, read this

So, you are reading this right? Why? Is your mind picturing wooden buckets with rope handles, overflowing with green bills? You may not believe that you will really get these buckets of money, but the over-the-top imagery appealed to you, and you are reading this. I did this as an example (or test of my persuasive skills) of what the newsletter from the Wizard of Ads said, posted by Sam Decker. Check out the Wizard's example:

"If you really want 'lots of lemon,' you must raise the impact quotient of your message; paint a bigger picture in the mind. Smile and say, 'I'd like iced tea with so many lemons that they slide off the table onto the floor. I'm talking about this restaurant being knee-deep in lemons when I leave, so many lemons that it takes two men and a little boy to carry them all. Will you do that for me?'

Do I get lots of lemon when I say this? Yes. Do I enjoy doing it? No. Do I think it's witty, cute, clever, funny? No.

I do it because I want the lemons."

As a B2B marketers, we tend toward the boring. We understate what's at stake and just assume that the facts are enough for the prospect to make his own decision. But we need to do what the Wizard says. (Think Geico ad.)

In fact, this image here comes from the winning ad in Test & Measurement World's annual contest, surveying their readers. "How prepared are you for nanometer design?" the headline reads, a message that would normally get lost in a B2B ad like this. Now its compelling and memorable to the readers.

Read more: Persuasiveness by Saying it "Visually":

What do I tell database publishers in November?

I've been invited to speak at InfoCommerce 2005, billed as "The Working Conference for the Thinking Publisher". Anne Holland (of MarketingSherpa) and I will be giving short 'sanity check' presentations to the attendees, who are marketers of databases and tools that provide sales leads. They want to hear from me, as a representative of 'the customer' of their products, like ThomasNet, InfoUSA, etc.

Its my opportunity to tell them about the pathetic web directories, pushy salespeople, and poor results I encounter. Or is there something more substantial you think I should talk about? Yes, there probably should be, but I haven't thought of it yet.

BTW: They have great copy about their conference and why one should attend. This is compelling writing, not the usual banter in conference brochures:

"What matters most now is quality, and that means...producing the authoritative source, providing sales leads that actually pay off, getting our advertisers'? phones to ring. And as those of you who have attended past InfoCommerce conferences know, our industry is delivering. We're now equipping our customers with ever deeper, fresher, and smarter data. But while we've cleared the bar on quality, how can we really prove it? That'?s the conumdrum.

Put your head together with those of the most ambitious and talented data publishers at infocommerce 2005 and let'?s tackle quality head on -? how to deliver it, how to prove it and how to price it."

Know more about your callers

Why struggle with copying down someone's address or spelling their company name when you've got them on the phone? I don't even ask people for their address any more, just phone and email. Let Google do the rest...I sent out the following tip to our salespeople:

Watch your caller ID on new prospect calls and write it down. I always 'Google' the number to verify the company, and quickly get their address, while they are still on the phone. Just type the phone number like this: 202-456-1111. Yahoo and MSN don't do this.

I know I'm repeating myself, but I know I've told my sales guys this before, too. Okay, it doesn't always work because of the way corporate phone systems dial out, but its worth trying. If not, just enter the phone number they give, if its not a direct-dial. See all the functionality as described by Google here.

Still one of the most useful tools for knowing more about a new prospect while they are still on the phone.

Fill in the *&@!!# blank

Why-oh-why do companies send out 'vendor application' forms in such pathetic formats? Today we've had one in PDF that must be printed out, hand filled (or ick, typed) and another one in Word. The Word form was laid out poorly so whenever you typed something in a blank, the rest of the form scrolled as the blank line '_____' pushed into a second line.

Do the people sending out these forms realize how unusable they are? And how much they waste our time just figuring out how to fill them out. Of course, what they are getting back isn't any more usable for them. Why can't this be an online form? Or a PDF form? Or a Word file configured to by filled out? I don't even mind having to fax it, if its easy to fill out.

Unfortunately, no one seems to care about forms. They have no one who cares about them or their use (except an ISO auditor). But they have to be a significant cost of doing business. They are just something to be printed and filed. I hope you care about the forms your company sends, or at least your department. Gosh, should a marketing or sales department send any forms to be filled out to anyone, anyway?

Do I meet expectations? Or keep users happy?

Have you noticed how I don't tell you what my company does in this blog? Unlike Scoble et. al., I choose not to. I could add the Feature of knowing about my company to the blog, but it would only serve to clutter up your User (reader) Experience. And then I wouldn't be able to be so candid, further ruining your experience. I make this simile to help illustrate the link I am about to provide, and my own commentary.

This is Broken links to a rant at Creating Passionate Users called: Featuritis vs. the Happy User Peak:

"Fear of being perceived as having fewer features than your competitors. Fear that you won't be viewed as complete. Fear that people are making purchase decisions off of a checklist, and that he who has the most features wins (or at the least, that he who has the fewest features definitely loses). Fear of losing key clients who say, 'If you don't add THIS... I'll have to go elsewhere.'"

This is exactly what my secret employer is currently facing. A couple competitors have added certain bells and whistles that our prospects are increasingly asking for. In a B2B world, comparing features on a spreadsheet is common. Our salespeople get frustrated every time it happens. Kathy Sierra's advice?

"Screw 'em. We believe that those providing the products and services that give the most 'I Rule' experiences, without tipping too far over the Happy User Peak, will be the most successful. (Obviously there are a ton of exceptions, and yes of course I'm overgeneralizing.)"

Her rant is a good reality check on feature-itis...but how does a marketer (or a salesperson) get 'happy user' in the spreadsheet? When the customer is ready to buy, they are dreaming of all the different ways they could use the product and feel more secure when it has a lot of extra features. I've got a dishwasher at home with seven different modes, but I only ever use one. Would I have bought a dishwasher with just one setting? No.

Unfortunately, the most effective way to sell against feature-itis is to negative sell, I think. "Have you seen how complicated that is?" "Are you ready to support those features?" "What if it has problems?" I hate negative selling, but do I have much choice? In the long run, I'll have a happier customer, if they buy from us.

Is China in your plan?

The clients we serve here are increasingly working on projects in, by, or with China. On top of that, we are also part of a global company that is selling our USA-made equipment in China. As a result, we will make a dozen trips to China this year, which has to be a lot for a company our size (under 100).

Not making the extra effort (and trips) is risky, as this article from McKinsey Quarterly (registration required) says:

"By the time these companies act to overcome such barriers, it may be too late: their multinational customers, which are rapidly expanding in China, may already have created networks of local Chinese suppliers. What's more, as these suppliers hone their skills by serving demanding multinationals, they will be even better placed to compete both in China and overseas."

Anita Campbell of Small Business Trends (who posted the link to the McKinsey article) is pessimistic about the chances of the SMB working in China:

"Precious few small businesses would be in a position to chase customers in China, even by pooling resources. Most small businesses have a tough enough time increasing their footprint in their own local markets. To attempt to go after markets half way around the world, with deep cultural and language differences, is a challenge most small businesses simply cannot overcome."

She is right that it is hard to do, but bypassing China may only be cause of a slow death, as their local market is also going to be drying up and going to China (as we have seen here in West Michigan's tool-and-die industry). We've been lucky to have clients and a parent company to give us a push. But for a lot of business, small or large, to grow, China has to be a part of the strategic vision so that they can push themselves. And plan on a lot of airline miles!

Anita does point out that sourcing in China may be more important (and do-able) for the SMB. This may be an easier way to gain experience there, so that you can then look at selling back to China.

Act differently than the competition

We already know that the customer doesn't want to be 'bugged' by salespeople, so why let your salespeople do it. John Jantsch suggests a controlled flood of targeted information to differentiate and gain the trust of the prospect. (Adding to my to-do list for use with Goldmine's Automated Processes.)

Duct Tape Marketing Weblog: Systematically Flood Your Leads With An Education:

"Here's the key to this storm. Don't ask for the order, don't try to get and appointment, don't call. Just keep sending them this perfectly scripted, useful information and watch what happens. I can hear sales trainers all over the world moaning about the subtleness of this approach but there is something very appealing about simply being there, giving great information and waiting, Oh, and there's something very referable about someone who sells this way!"

No one cares what you name your new product

I've got a product that was named by engineering--not wonderful, but not worth wasting energy on, according to Chris Gloede. Just like naming a baby, when its yours, the name is so important, but no one else really cares too much (except maybe your mother).

Rants on Modern Marketing: Product: Naming Really Isn't That Important:

"But I’ve come to the conclusion that for small and mid-sized businesses, the secret to a good name is…having a good product supported with good marketing. Really, if you’ve got a good product and good marketing then lets just slap on a mediocre name and get along with it, OK?"

Bad news about manufacturing in the USA

The Real Direction of U.S. Manufacturing : Industrial Market Trends: "since 1980, manufacturing construction -- that is the building of new plants and the expansion of existing plants -- has fallen from 10% of total nonresidential construction to 2%."

After two years, we still remain the only manufacturer in our new industrial development. In the next couple years in nearby Grand Rapids, Steelcase will be basically be leaving a whole block vacant. This is major stuff!